used to do
Putting a name on how I feel is like searching a book for every word I know and not finding any word to describe how I feel about you right at this moment besides...empty...
Used to this and used to that.
Well, it's not over!!! We still have time for more used to's.
Late at night and quiet, and I never felt so far away from someone when they were just sleeping in the next room.
I dance alone in the kitchen and wish you were there. I sing a song at the top of my lungs, then looking to my right and remembering you not there singing along with me...or just laughing. But we had that the other day, so it's not always.
And I could have you today and have you tomorrow. I'm sorry for my bottle like ways when I hide my feelings around you just to avoid "words". Then I let them losse, and you supposedly don't have a clue yet you know it all.
I wish you could bring me a flower on a breezy day.
Give me a simple kiss on my cheek, say you'll love me forever, then hold your hand out for an after noon dance in the kitchen.
Remember? Like we used to.
But it's not over yet!
Wait until November ends and we'll be back under moonlit skys and stars that shine where I used to think they shone only for us.
I hate that you're sick now, and I'll reach in my pocket to give you a bite. Always, like you do... did... do...
I want your hand again. To make love and look in each others eyes without it being forever until we got in that very wonderful, loving, sweet, magic position.
Soft quick kiss goodbye today, I looked back before I walked inside. Maybe you'd look at me. It's okay though, you were in a rush for work. That's why you looked straight ahead and didn't look back and smile that sweet goofy half smiling and half loving look you give... like you used to.
But it's not over yet!!
When we sit after having a fun day, look in eachothers eyes with that same look and say loves.
I'll watch the hours fly. And you don't have to be a thousand miles away for me to miss you. It already feels like you are.
It's not over yet. And that's what I have to say.... I can wait for the day, and I'm sure it'll all be okay. It doesn't always have to be used to anyway.
I'll put my used to's in a box and find what we have now and put it out on display.
Thursday, Nov. 03, 2005
8:29 p.m.
8:29 p.m.